2021-03-03 ~ Kinky Talks 16: Happy Coronaversary!

Hans as a Kink Aware Coach giving his perspective (with a little technical hickup)

We decided that we would dedicate this talk to the coronanniversary. About a year into lockdowns, one year into coping with loneliness and working where you live, a year into trying to cope, perhaps drinking a bit much, smoking or swallowing more than we should. A year of mostly abstaining from nightlife, or maybe going to secret private parties…
How do we cope?
After the introduction, we talked about -of course- politics and madness, about how things went array in different ways all over the world, about a little civil disobedience, here and there.

18 ways of coping (in 9 polarities)
1. Am I going to do this independently or is it better to do this together with others?
2. Do I express my feelings about this subject or do I choose to control my feelings about it?
3. Do I want to emphasize my involvement in a situation or do I want to keep (or gain) more distance?
4. Do I adapt or do I set limits?
5. Am I actively looking for errors in situations or do I remain optimistic about the outcomes?
6. Am I going to act intuitively or am I going to work systematically towards a goal?
7. Do I accept the here and now or do I keep hoping for a better future?
8. Do I allow myself to  seek distraction or do I stay focused?
9. Do I wait or do I take action?

Bindels & West

“Gimme, gimme, gimme a vaccine after midnight. Won’t somebody help me chase the COVID away”

Adalberto

Mostly we talked about how our perspective has changed because of Covid, how our attention shifted from big raves to smaller parties where at least you are able to meet people.

We talked about the responsibilities of sash wearers and figureheads and how it’s, on the one hand, you want to show the world they should not hide and on the other hand, you don’t want people to get infected.
We tried to help each other and tried to sympathise with how hard patience feels if you have to have it, locked away with family in countries without friends or parties. The privileged (us) won’t know we are until we are told so (and that message may hurt a little). We talked about how death and fear of death may have been changed and that we better prepare for a ‘new normal’ with a virus, where the world indeed might learn a lesson or two from the gay community, because it’s a community that has learned to live with a virus before the rest of the world had to do so (and the rest of the world took their sweet time).

There are no easy answers…
But if we’re prepared for change we might cope better…


Interesting Links from this talk

#HONEYIAMGOOD:
https://youtu.be/kKpHJL1L1Ps

Kan het nog gekker? met Rachèl BeauJolie – Afl. 1
https://www.facebook.com/events/170080621428717/

International Gay Fetish Photo Competition (vote here):
https://morepixx.com/vote-here-2/

SLFC’s Fetish Short Film Festival 2021:
https://fb.me/e/19Vjq7IZ3

SLFC’s video’s wil be seen at:
https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCUHhMY2OFASOFJeR7B0gEMQ


And Humor is important!



If you got questions or ideas for new kinky talks: tell Hans or Adalberto.
See you there!





Published by KinkindeRelatie

A Kink Aware and openminded (relationship) coach. That does not mean you have to talk about kink, but at least here you don't have to be silent about it.

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