2022-06-01 ~ Kinky Talks 33: Long-ing Relationships… (long term, long distance)

This is a temporary file… I am really really busy these days (finding and moving house and such. So please be forgiving) 2022-06-01 ~ Kinky Talks 33: Long-ing Relationships… (long term, long-distance)https://hetruigerewerk.wordpress.com/portfolio/2022-06-01-kinky-talks-33-longing-relationships-long-term-long-distance/ Discussion notes: Punishing over distance is not so easy. Because you can’t whip or pinch. But you can punish your slave over longContinue reading “2022-06-01 ~ Kinky Talks 33: Long-ing Relationships… (long term, long distance)”

2022-03-02 ~ Kinky Talks 30: Kink & Shame

What are we shaming ourselves for? Where are we shaming others? Where does it add to our lust and where does it start to be in the way? We were talking tonight about a politically, and sexually hot topic: shame!Hans’s presentation about kink and shame, and the effects of being shamed in our culture (andContinue reading “2022-03-02 ~ Kinky Talks 30: Kink & Shame”

2021-11-13 ~ Kinky Talks 26: Kinky Activism

Hans Verhoeven gave us a really informative talk about his work as an activist and we had a long (long!) discussion afterwards. He started with telling us about his activism that he often says: “it begins with a cup of coffee”Meet people and find out what they are doing and see whether you can teamContinue reading “2021-11-13 ~ Kinky Talks 26: Kinky Activism”

2021-10-06 ~ Kinky Talks 25: The Psychology of kinks

In this talk, we were diving into the kinky mind and we heard about the most recent research from a psychological perspective on “people who practice kinks”. Guided by Karina Kehlet Lins we tried to better understand what it is that draws us towards practising BDSM. And she talked about how the clinical world isContinue reading “2021-10-06 ~ Kinky Talks 25: The Psychology of kinks”

2021-09-04 ~ Kinky Talks 24: From Sex to Chems and Back

Especially the people who are fond of kicks and new sensations and people who like to party and play, they are likely to have encounters with drugs (and alcohol is a drug too) and/or with people that use drugs in a combination with sex. Watch the talk about chemsex without blame or nonsense. And ifContinue reading “2021-09-04 ~ Kinky Talks 24: From Sex to Chems and Back”

2021-08-04 ~ Kinky Talks 23: Puppies and their bone(r)s

The world of pupies is far away from our own ‘normal’ world for a lot of us kinksters. But in the last years this kink is really booming. And the playfulness of this kink is be really appealing. Docile dogs, beauty-dogs, bratty dogs, playful dogs. People on all fours running around really feeling like beingContinue reading “2021-08-04 ~ Kinky Talks 23: Puppies and their bone(r)s”

2021-07-07 ~ Kinky Talks 22: A deep dive into sub space…

There are a lot of ideas and opinions about subspace. It has to do with pain it has to do with humiliation, it has to do with role-play, it’s all about endorphins in the brain et cetera et cetera. Let’s be clear, there is no final answer yet in science for it simply has notContinue reading “2021-07-07 ~ Kinky Talks 22: A deep dive into sub space…”

2021-06-15 ~ Kinky Talks 21: Monster Toys, Monster fun?

We feel that we are not stretching it when Adalberto and I both hoped for a really deep talk about the things one could do with big toys. And even tho we were prepared well for some really in-depth discussion about ways “to go the distance” and perhaps some “how to’s“, to go where noContinue reading “2021-06-15 ~ Kinky Talks 21: Monster Toys, Monster fun?”

2021-05-26 ~ Kinky Talks 20: Consent is Sexy!

Consent is always a hot topic and we need to talk about it. Especially now that we are crawling out of our covid-enclosures onto the stage of meeting people in the flesh again.Us kinksters, we want to abuse and be abused… without really abusing anyone. We want to have fun with stretching holes and limitsContinue reading “2021-05-26 ~ Kinky Talks 20: Consent is Sexy!”

2021-05-05 ~ Kinky Talks 19: The world of gimps and drones

The world of gimps and drones: imagine you’d be in rubber enclosure being (ab)used or being enjoyed visually. Gear, rules, differences, masks, anonymity and freedom in rubber restriction… there is so much to know. So let’s ask the specialists: Jack Hellwing and Johnny Iron! We’ll ask them to explain to us the various different formsContinue reading “2021-05-05 ~ Kinky Talks 19: The world of gimps and drones”

2021-04-14 ~ Kinky Talks 18: Is more extreme more fun?

People do view us kinksters as being a bit extreme sometimes. Does that have to do with ‘the media’ portraying us as ‘extreme’ so they can offer the readers a nice and voyeuristic view (and then distance themselves with quotes like: “we are happy that we don’t need that“). Or are only the people thatContinue reading “2021-04-14 ~ Kinky Talks 18: Is more extreme more fun?”

2021-03-24 ~ Kinky Talks 17: What makes a good Dominant?

After an annoying start due to technical zoom sh#t, Hans West and Johnny Iron started this evening up with some basic thoughts about the question “What makes a good Dominant?” And not so much the obvious “things”, the visible and the ‘twitterable’, but rather the person underneath the Dom. The relationship underneath the D/s.

2021-03-03 ~ Kinky Talks 16: Happy Coronaversary!

Mostly we talked about how our perspective has changed because of Covid, how our attention shifted from big raves to smaller parties where at least you are able to meet people. “Gimme, gimme, gimme a vaccine after midnight. Won’t somebody help me chase the COVID away” Adalberto

2021-01-21 ~ Kinky Talks 14: What’s your favourite online fetish platform?

We got a cool panel of people to talk about why their favourite platforms We started with the question where our first platforms were. And some of us our talk with our ‘confessions’ about what basically our 1st platforms in the world of kink were (sometimes fresh, so for some of us almost pre-internet). WhereContinue reading “2021-01-21 ~ Kinky Talks 14: What’s your favourite online fetish platform?”

2020-12-30 ~ Kinky Talks 13: New Year’s Resolutions (bucket- & fuckitlists)

Hindsight is 2020 frontsight is 2021? Our talk together went (as my last name suggests) from East to West and from North to South and around the clock. We all shared our own ideas about the last year and plans for the next one.Hope for the best… Plan for the best…

2020-12-09 ~ Kinky Talks 12: Info on HIV and PrEP

Today we had Stephan Metzlar-Rudolph Mr. Leather NL 2020 and Snorella WC, Ambassador for the AIDS Healthcare Foundation. There is still a lot of misunderstanding about HIV. The virus is still the same (well… actually not quite, but that’s not the point here). But treatment possibilities have changed dramatically since the ’80s and ’90s withContinue reading “2020-12-09 ~ Kinky Talks 12: Info on HIV and PrEP”

2020-11-18 ~ Kinky Talks 11: How to avoid Drama!

We were talking about Drama in the scene and in our (sex) lives. Hans did a little talk about ‘drama’ and how it could be looked upon along the lines of the ‘Drama Triangle’ by Karpman (a psychologist with a love for the Greek Drama -and the three roles of ‘drama’: the Victim, the RescuerContinue reading “2020-11-18 ~ Kinky Talks 11: How to avoid Drama!”

2020-10-28 ~ Kinky Talks 10: Leather! (guest: Stephan – Mr Leather NL)

Stephan was talking about the ways Covid influenced his life as a regular clubber and darkroom enthusiast, being “jailed at home”. When you are in an open relationship, you didn’t need to get your sexual kicks at home.Now, you do have to discover new things together.Stephan talked about how it created a nearness and aContinue reading “2020-10-28 ~ Kinky Talks 10: Leather! (guest: Stephan – Mr Leather NL)”

2020-10-07 ~ Kinky Talks 09: Dom space, sub Space (guest: Spot)

This date we had a special guest: Spot (on instagram: alpha_switch_spot)And he did talk a lot about D/s relationships and subjects like: collars and D/s households, the differences between TPE vs PPEP, about protocols and its meanings, his ideas about subspace and headspace and impact play.Also joining us was Karina Lins who wrote “Samtalen omContinue reading “2020-10-07 ~ Kinky Talks 09: Dom space, sub Space (guest: Spot)”

2020-06-24 ~ Long term Kinky Relationships? 003

A bit more local than last time: Dutchies, Italians and Germans 😀Hans explained some ideas about relationship phases and things you might want to look into when one decides to have: a long term relation, a relation as a fetishist, a power exchange relationship, or a longterm power-exchange relationship and terminology from the world ofContinue reading “2020-06-24 ~ Long term Kinky Relationships? 003”

2020-06-10 ~ Do kinksters look for extremes?

Again a great international crowd: from ‘Frieslân’ Via Germany, London and Italy to L.A. USA. 😀Hans laid out some theoretical ideas about possible reasons why we are sometimes, or maybe just seen as some time as being more extreme, maybe. But on the other hand, thinking too much about the ‘why’ of our kinks isContinue reading “2020-06-10 ~ Do kinksters look for extremes?”